
I remember wondering why people got so stressed out by Christmas. I had two (or fewer or no) children, a healthy husband, a relatively neat house, no one being schooled, and my Christmas shopping done by Thanksgiving. I loved Christmas.
But these last few years, I finally understand. Sick husband, homeschooling, crawling babies, messy house, decorations that take weeks to get up instead of one day (despite the fact that what I put up drastically shrinks every year), and shopping that takes every spare moment (even when done online - and I'm finally almost done).
It seems that no matter how many pairs of jingle bell earrings I buy and wear. No matter how many Christmassy programs or parades I attend. No matter how much Christmas music I listen to, I just can't keep a hold of that Christmas spirit. It's lost under the weight of "one more thing."
Because when you're nearly drowning in baby, kids, school, laundry, and dishes. Even the simple things in Christmas are one more thing. Straws that break that camels back. And this year they're breaking me. Especially when you add the other kinds of straws. A missed church Christmas program after dragging three kids out alone in cold rain because the auditorium was full. Misunderstandings.
But don't you learn the most when your broken? Isn't that when you learn to become dependent because no matter how hard you try, you just can't do it all? I believe I have a seriously low learning curve in this area.
I need to learn from the Teacher. I need to hear Him. I want to love Him. And I want to love Christmas again.